Ep. 77: The Obsidian Cloud, Part 4

Kyle

Previously on Quest Friends…

[Intro song begins, “Friends” by Miracle of Sound.]

Emily (as Elee)

I’m on this boat. I am on this boat now, and you all are on this boat. We are at that point. We are all on the boat.

Tom

Xoc will do one of those scared “mm-hmm” nods, like “oh, uh-huh, yeah!”

Tom (as Xoc)

It’s actually been a very long time since I’ve seen a large body of water. I grew up by the sea.

Ari (as Misha)

Oh. I have encountered it on my research, but I have not actually seen the ocean. Is it as big as I have heard?

Tom (as Xoc)

I never explored the whole ocean, so I don't know how big it is.

Ari (as Misha)

Maybe we can watch them together while you also show me how to keep frogs in the real ocean.

Tom (as Xoc)

Yeah! I would also enjoy that. We should make plans to do that… once we save the world and all that.

We don’t even necessarily have to call someone. We can just get them. I could teleport back and teleport people here. We have time, after all. We have days. That’s time enough to convince the Weal, and that’s time to bring people here.

Emily (as Elee)

Hey, Ignatius.

Kyle (as Ignatius)

Yes?

Emily (as Elee)

You know how you, uh, made me my claws?

Kyle (as Ignatius)

[Shakily.] Yes?

Emily (as Elee)

Are you still making anything?

Tom

You’ve used the incorrect swimsuit for Sir Kentrim.

Kyle

What’s his swimsuit change into?

Tom

Well, it’s a little hard to describe. It looks a bit like an old-timey bathing suit, but it has—

Hallie

No. No! I’m gonna cut you off right now, because you’re wrong!

Tom

It has a deep V-neck.

Hallie

Because that suit intentionally hides what you want to see! I don’t want you to do that, because I don’t want to see—I like Welkin. I don’t wanna see the suit again. No.

Tom

[Laughs.]

[Intro music swells and carries into the episode.]

Tom

One day there was a baby dragon lying in a bed of flowers.

[Happy, child-like music begins]

The dragon’s name was Inuki, but the flowers, they never did say. Maybe the flowers didn’t speak in psychic links, or maybe they couldn’t think of what to tell her, or maybe they were simply shy… but Inuki didn’t mind. She always had so much to share: stories of adventures, and of flying, and of her best friend in the whole wide world who saved her from that nasty TJ and did everything he could to keep her safe.

And Inuki felt safe. She had felt safe for a long time. But the flowers, well… with a rump-bump-bump the baby dragon pounced on her pray and with a munch-munch-munch she gobbled up all the flowers resting in the bed. But, for the first time, Inuki didn’t eat every single flower, she didn’t even eat half, because her belly was full and the flowers were so pretty. Inuki knew it would be selfish not to share them with all her friends, because Inuki had friends. She had so many friends, and she had so many flowers, and she was so, so, so very happy.

[Music repeats. Threatening ambience begins.]

Kyle

For the 18,000,657th time, Inuki’s memory began anew.

It had been 40 years since she had been consumed by the Apocrita, but to her not a single second had past, not… one.

[“One” repeats more and more quickly and collapses in digital distortion.]

[Music ends.]

Kyle

Okay. So, it is the next day. You have successfully convinced the Weal to engage in your plan to restart the generator that powers the barrier and to pull in a whole host of friends on your quest to slay the Apocrita. … That was way too forced. You’re gonna pull in a bunch of people from previous episodes.

The Ring of Power worked perfectly. You could easily pull in people. The issue is the house, because most of the people you’re trying to pull are folks who are human-sized but there are others that you know will want to bring things along that are much bigger than your house can handle. Like, you don’t want Jimmy Win’s car to come bursting through your living room.

Tom

[Amused.] Can we teleport people to like an open space inside the Weal?

Kyle

Unfortunately the way the teleportation works is it creates basically a circle in which any of you can walk in, grab the staff, and then from the Ring of Power teleport anywhere and teleport back, but you teleport back to the ring itself. You just basically need to clear out the house and make it so that things can easily get out. It should only take about a day or so, but Horus, Jaykell, Unit 909, and some other members of the Weal need a day to get it all set up.

You may have offered to help them, you may not have, but if you had offered to help Horus would have assured you that no,

[00:05:00]

they’re fine, you’ve got a big day coming, you should take it to rest, and if you really pushed on him he’d point out that the Weal really wants to handle it.

So, you got the day off, and where else to go in the Weal but the one premiere destination?

[It’s able to get you connected to it..]

So you are on the crumby, cold, overcast beach. The waves are crashing not only against the rock but against the Ladybug which is nestled on the beachside. How you got it there—Does anyone have any ideas? Because I don’t.

Hallie

Moved a mountain?

Tom

We flew it there?

[Music ends.]

Ari

I literally have a thing that I used a couple of sessions ago where I moved mountains, so I can do that to move any single thing that we need. It’s literally called—

Emily

Or we could—

Kyle

[Smiling.] You used a mountain to punch the Ladybug into the air!

Tom

We could just fly it around the mountain a slight bit and get it to the beach.

Kyle

Well that’s how you got it airborne faster, you punch it into the air with a mountain and then you fly it.

Tom

[Pinched.] We could just fly it! It like…

Ari

I could also just flex for Xoc, to impress him even more.

Hallie

[Laughs.] “I can move this car!”

Kyle

Were you impressed, Xoc?

Tom

I mean, I think Xoc is a little concerned, like “oh, I hope we don’t accidentally disrupt the Weal and they get angry again, but you’re also doing very good, Misha. Well done. Ah.”

Ari

It’s like their courtship dance is doing this flex.

[Laughter.]

Tom

“Oh, this is so nice, but we could also fly it. Ah…”

Emily

No one talks to Misha about the potential consequences for the creatures living underground.

Ari

Oh no. Misha has not thought about the ecosystem.

Tom

Ooh, that could be a way.

Kyle

Oh no…

Tom

That could be a way, like “no Misha, the rock worms.”

Ari

Oh no. Misha would stop to not hurt the rock worms.

Kyle (as Q-BO)

[Beep-boop.] Rock worms are a unique species that must exist at a certain level above sea level. If their elevation changes by more than ten feet they will spontaneously combust.

Tom

No… No! Why, Kyle!? I’m X-Carding that because I don’t like that lore.

Ari

[Tenderly.] Aww.

Kyle (as Q-BO)

[Beep-boop.] If their elevation changes by more than ten feet they will cease to exist.

[Beep-boop.] … As rock worms. At which point they will turn into moss flies.

Tom

[Chuckles.] Oh…

Kyle

[Chuckles.] So yeah, the mountain punches up the Ladybug and then outside the side a bunch of fuzzy green flies come bursting out.

Tom

Like a beautiful bouquet. [Laughs.]

Ari

Misha loves that.

Tom

For Misha and Xoc.

Ari

Oh  yeah, such a romantic. [Laughs.]

Kyle

So the point is, the Ladybug is on the beach.

[Celebratory beach music begins.]

It’s a small beach. It’s always overcast. It’s a mix of rock and sand and metal, plus there is this metal pier that is half rusted half not, because some of the metal rusts, and moored to it is a dinky little sailboat that is also rusted against it, because nobody has sailed in a long, long time.

So, my question for each of you, because this is our casual fun prepping for the finale beach episode… What are each of you doing? What are each of you wearing? Because it’s not a beach episode without fun swimsuits. And then Hopper, what is your Flex Skill for the new day?

Tom

Hopper first. Hopper first!

Hallie

No! No! Okay, um…

[Music ends.]

Tom

We also don’t have to go you first if you don’t want to.

Kyle

If it’s a Flex Skill, we warned you about this three hours ago.

Hallie

That doesn’t mean that I figured it out! I need more time.

Okay, I think I know what I want to go with, so I will go first. So for what he’s wearing, I know some of you were thinking isn’t it just Welkin’s swimsuit from Valkyria Chronicles, but the answer is to an extent, but no, because that swimsuit sucks. I have reference images that you don’t need to link.

Kyle

Okay, but you need to send me those images, because they’re going in the description to the episode.

Hallie

[Laughs.] I will. I will. I’ll send them to you, but for now, this is Tyler from Mystery Date and his suit is like… [Laughs.]

Kyle

Is that Chris Evans?!

Hallie

Yeah it is! There’s this old game called Mystery Date that was a big part of my childhood where you had to call to figure out who asked you on a date and so all the cards—

Ari

Oh my god! I had that game!

Hallie

Yeah, it’s so good!

Ari

I had that game! Yes!

Hallie

All these cards with these like teenage boys with little bios, and Tyler is the surf one, and he’s Chris Evans. He has this short-sleeved surf suit, and then here’s like a better picture of a short-sleeved surf suit. That’s what his suit looks like.

Tom

So it’s like a wetsuit.

Hallie

It’s like a wetsuit, but it’s short.

Ari

Important question. Is he still wearing his hat? Because I think this was a Twitter poll, but are you keeping that answer to the poll?

Hallie

[Exhales.]

Kyle

You know Misha would have made a waterproof hat.

Ari

Oh, they would have, somehow.

Hallie

[Reluctantly.] I know that Misha would have made a waterproof hat, and I know that Hopper doesn’t wanna get sunburnt, so he’s wearing his hat.

Kyle

[Triumphantly.] Yeah!

Hallie

With his brown short-sleeved surf suit.

[00:10:00]

Then, what he’s doing is inspecting that dinky little sailboat to see if it’s maybe able to sail, because his Flex Skill is the first one under the list of possible Flex Skills I forgot I had, and that first option for me is DIY Projects.

[Laughing.] So I wanna fix up the sailboat as part of a DIY Pinterest project, please.

Kyle

Give me a roll.

Tom

Holy shit.

Hallie

Okay!

Ari

[Playfully mocking.] Please?

Hallie

[Laughing.] Okay.

[Rolls.] Fifteen!

Kyle

Oh yeah, that bad boy can sail.

Hallie

[Triumphantly.] Yeah!

Kyle

It just needs a little bit of grease, a little bit of work, but you can get that to sail in a little bit.

Hallie

Oh, these are the best dice. I love these dice.

Kyle

While Hopper is working on that, we’ve still got time for everyone else to do their thing. What are other folks doing?

Emily

Elee’s wearing her normal clothes. She just has not changed at all. She’s maybe taken off two of her shawls, but she wears at least five, so it hasn’t really changed that much.

Kyle

Can I make a suggestion?

Emily

Yes.

Kyle

So Rei knew you were uncomfortable with water and were uncomfortable at the beach, right? But Sera was so excited, and poor little Anastasia would always ask “why isn’t Miss Elee wearing a swimsuit?”

Emily

Aww.

Kyle

So Rei got you, similar to Hopper’s hat, a swimsuit that looks identical to your regular clothing so that way you can be—

[Laughter.]

Emily (as Elee)

“But Rei, why don’t I just go in with my regular clothes? It’s the same thing, Rei.”

Hallie

[Laughing.] It’s not those swimsuits are made to get wet better than normal clothes.

Kyle

Regardless.

Emily

Elee’s going to be keeping her distance from the water anyway, and she’s gonna be like, from quite a ways back, being like:

Emily (as Elee)

[Nervously.] Hopper, maybe you shouldn’t. Maybe… Maybe just don’t get in the boat. It doesn’t look like it’s very sturdy. I don't know if it’s really worth fixing, you know? Maybe just leave it.

Kyle

Hop’s got one foot in already. “What was that?”

Hallie (as Hopper)

It’s gonna float!

Tom

I’m loving the image of Hopper has just gotten out some power tools that he’s acquired over the journey. “Oh, you just need to make a quick cut here and we can have an easy replacement for this part of the boat.”

Emily (as Elee)

Now you’re cutting holes in it?

Hallie (as Hopper)

Well, they’re good holes. I’m gonna fill up the holes with something else.

Kyle

Okay, so who’s next? Who’s our next victim?

Ari

Well Misha is wearing, if anybody in the audience has played Persona 5, they are wearing exactly the same outfit that Yusuke wears to the beach, because Yusuke and Misha are basically the same person.

Kyle

It’s just swim trunks and a hoodie.

Ari

Yeah.

Hallie

[Laughs.]

Emily

A white terrycloth hoodie.

Tom

Swim trunks with a hoodie, and the hood is up. The hood is up.

Ari

The hood is up.

Tom

That’s a very important part of the ensemble.

Ari

The hood is up. Yeah. They are wearing that. I don't know where they got it, but they have it, and they are wearing that in the beach.

Kyle

And what are they up to?

Ari

It’s their first time on the beach, ever, I think. I don't think they ever actually have been to a beach, so they are just enjoying it, enjoying seeing the ocean, and maybe even like… Misha would go and try to skip stones in the water. Actually skip stones this time rather than the other euphemism for skipping stones that they do with Xoc.

[Laughter.]

Kyle

Give me a roll.

Ari

Okay. [Rolls.]

Emily

Elee starts having heart palpitations for no reason.

Ari

It’s a 7.

Kyle

PLONK!

You throw with superhuman strength, and it just plunks in the water, but around it as the ripples go out you can see this technicolor light beam out.

Ari

Misha will turn excitedly to Xoc and say…

Ari (as Misha)

I did not see the stone skip, but there is some white glow you didn’t mention before. I did not know this was part of the process.

Ari

…and then try and go investigate that glow.

Kyle

As you go to check it out you can see these small globs of ant-like crustaceans that seem to light up whenever they get agitated.

Ari

Misha will just follow them.

Ari (as Misha)

You never talked about these ones before, Xoc. What are these?

Tom (as Xoc)

Those are called craves. They’re really colorful, and it’s fun seeing them, especially at night. They get super bright. You get to see all of the seafloor nearby, the little reefs off-shore. You gotta be careful you don’t give them any knives, though. Once they got ahold of a knife and that wasn’t a great day, but other than that they’re usually pretty nice.

Ari (as Misha)

I like them.

Ari

Misha has already picked a couple up and is holding them on both arms.

Tom

Yes. Yes!

Kyle

They instinctually glob together in a familiar-looking ball.

Ari

Oh yes! Misha will excitedly introduce them to their ball of ants.

[00:15:00]

Ari (as Misha)

I know this is not your natural habitat, ants, but I would like you to explore other cultures and environments.

Hallie

[Laughs.]

Ari (as Misha)

So I want to present you with your possible cousins, the craves. I hope you become friends.

Ari

And just like put them together in a like “now kiss” kind of meme.

[Laughter.]

Kyle

It’s like an international exchange program. “Go ants!” and just toss the ants into the water.

Tom

[Laughs.]

Ari

No, yeah, that is kind of how it is.

Tom

[Recovering.] Oh…

Kyle

So Ari, give me a roll.

Ari

Oh boy.

Kyle

And you will be specialized in this roll.

Ari

I feel like Hallie commissioned this dice for me, because this dice are not good for rolling. I feel like that was her ulterior motive.

Hallie

Ah-ha~!

Tom

She worked witchcraft into the dice itself with the commission.

Ari

Yeah.

Hallie

Ha~!

Tom

“Oh, that die set? Yes.”

Hallie

That’s my Flex Skill all along.

Tom

[Chuckling.] Your Flex Skill.

Hallie

Witchcraft.

Ari

[Rolls.] I rolled an 11.

Kyle

Eleven? Okay. So you do not have two balls of ants anymore.

Ari

Oh no.

Kyle

You now have two balls of ants and craves together.

Ari

Oh yes. Misha will be really happy and be like…

Ari (as Misha)

Oh, I am pleased that they have learned to get along so well!

Ari

…and introduce the craves to the little ant house that they are carrying somehow. I assume that it folds or something, and Misha will unfold it and introduce them to the house.

Kyle

New compartment you fill with water.

Ari

Yes, and put them in there.

Kyle

Alright. Ness, what are you wearing and what are you doing?

Hallie

Ness has one of those crappy little dime store masks that are really thick plastic.

Kyle

Like the thick plastic goggles that you usually have with a snorkel set?

Hallie

Yeah, because he has a snorkel, too. He’s got the full set. They match. He has little flippers, and he has a little inner tube that he surfaces through sometimes, but he is in the water. He is kicking.

Tom

[Nervously.] Oh…

Hallie

He is having a grand old time.

Hallie (as Ness)

Elee, look at me!

Emily (as Elee)

[Nervously.] I am!

Kyle

[Laughs.]

Hallie (as Ness)

I’m so far out!

Emily (as Elee)

[Sobbing.] No! Come back!

[Laughter.]

Hallie (as Ness)

I can’t even see the bottom!

Emily

Elee will wade in at that. The issue with Elee is that she’s so full of metal that she sinks, so she can’t get out there, but she’s wading as far as she can and being like “no, come back in closer!”

Kyle

Ness has a snorkel. It’s fine. He can give you the snorkel. You just gotta make it out there first.

Tom

Is the snorkel long enough?

Emily

How long is the snorkel?!

Hallie

It’s like a standard snorkel.

Kyle

It’s just a straw, plastic straw.

[Laughter.]

Emily

It’s gotta be a lot longer.

Kyle

Alright. Xoc, you’re the last one standing. What are you wearing? What are you doing?

Tom

… So Xoc is just wearing the Welkin swimsuit.

[Laughter.]

Hallie

No! No! No! You can’t do this to me!

Kyle

It’s linked in the chat below. It’s linked in the description below.

Tom

Yeah, there will be links below, but let me describe with words for a moment.

Hallie

You can’t do this to me! Agh! No!

Tom

So it’s like this gray, lighter and darker gray striped 1920s-looking bathing suit.

Hallie

No… No! God. Agh…

Tom

It has, instead of like a normal top with sleeves—

Hallie

Yeah!

Tom

—like approaching the wetsuit that Hopper has, and instead just has these sort of straps over the shoulders, and it’s kind of a V-neck.

Hallie

No. Ugh!

Tom

Which is especially unflattering, because unlike Welkin Xoc has no definition to his upper body, so it just doesn’t look good.

Hallie

It wouldn’t flatter even if he did, because it’s a bad swimsuit!

Tom

And then it’s like short shorts down in the single piece.

Hallie

Yeah.

Tom

And there are like… I forgot, there are like little buttons in the middle, but only two, only two buttons.

Hallie

Yeah. What the fuck are those there for?

Tom

Where the V-neck meets. It makes no sense.

Hallie

None at all.

Tom

But that’s what Xoc has.

Hallie

Oh my god. I’m so mad. You waited this long to play me like this.

Emily

[Giggles.]

Tom

I’m going to be frank.

Hallie

I hate it.

Tom

I hadn’t thought of a swimsuit yet for Xoc, but then I was just like… there’s one ready-made for me.

Hallie

God, I’m furious.

Ari

Misha, on seeing this swimsuit, will say:

Ari (as Misha)

You know Xoc, I thought I didn’t like that particular piece of clothing since, last time I saw it, it was on a person that wasn’t particularly agreeable to me.

Tom

[Hushed.] Oh god. I forgot.

Ari (as Misha)

But now I see that it actually looks good on you, so I think the person really does shape the suit.

Tom

I forgot we gave it to Kentrim, didn’t we?

Ari

Yeah, you gave it to Kentrim.

Tom

Oh shit!

Kyle

So what is Xoc doing? Because when Kentrim wore this suit he was like…

Ari

Flexing, right?

Kyle

Yeah. I think it was like the swimsuit portion of the student…

Tom

Yeah.

Kyle

…of the prom oligarchy thing, the Proligarchy.

Hallie

Ha.

Ari

Yeah.

Emily

Did his thong explode into this suit or something?

Ari

[Laughs.]

Kyle

Yes. I believe it was something like he had a thong and then he ripped it off and it was this suit.

Tom

I have completely blocked that from my memory. Holy shit. What the fuck even happened in Crime & Courtship?

[Laughter.]

How the fuck did I forget something that weird happened? It’s because everything that happens here is weird.

Ari

Everything is cursed, but Sir Kentrim is particularly cursed.

Tom

Like, I couldn’t remember it because when he flexes he lactates.

[00:20:00]

[Laughter.]

Ari

That’s so gross.

Tom

[Groans.]

Kyle

Listen. I’ve spent a year not being nearly as cursed as I could. I’d like to say I’ve grown as a person, but really that just means my art has suffered.

Tom

Yeah. You’ve been trying to suppress it, but you can’t undo what you’ve done. There’s nothing that will wash away your sins.

Emily

It’s on the internet.

Kyle

So anyways, you’re not… Unless you’re doing a sexy strut up and down the pier, which wearing the suit automatically kinda makes you wanna do, what are you actually doing? [Laughs.]

Tom

So, Xoc has been trying to put on a good face for people and was genuinely excited to show Misha the craves and show Misha the beach in general, because he loves this beach. However, he really did want to help move things out. He wants to make sure that everything is prepared.

So, when he’s told “no, there’s nothing you can do to help right now, take a break,” Xoc is lying on his back on a towel on the beach, stiff as a board, staring directly at the sky, just like UGH. If it was a cartoon it would slowly zoom in on him in several shots, and the last shot would just be the bloodshot eyes staring up at the sky. “Relaxation.”

Ari

Can I… Well, I don't know if this is pushing the ship or whatever too much, but can I become an expert at like spa massaging or something?

Hallie

[Cackles.]

Ari

And then Misha at some point—

Kyle

Is it pushing the ship too much?

Tom

[Stammering.] Is it pushing the ship?!

Kyle

You are a patron relationship, plus this is a beach episode. This is silly stuff and fan service, and now that we’ve done your descriptions, you all just go until we’re done. So, the only objection I have is Misha would have no idea that is how you relax a person. They wouldn’t think “yes, I’m gonna look up how to spa massage,” so I need you to figure out how Misha got to learning that skill.

Ari

Well how about just… Misha looks up how to relax with a special friend or something like that.

Tom

Oh no.

Ari

How to relax a special friend, or how to ease the stress of a special friend.

Several

[As a groan.] Oh no…

Tom

Oh dear. I’m very tempted to google that in real life and see what the fuck happens.

Hallie

And just see what comes up.

Tom

But let’s do it in an incognito browser.

Emily

Please do.

Ari

[Laughing.] Am I getting in too deep?

Tom

[Typing.] How to relax a special friend?

Kyle

I was typing something at that moment, so I have no idea what was being discussed. Anyways.

Emily

[Laughing.] Tom is googling in an incognito browser…

Kyle

I figured out that much.

Ari

[Laughing.] What did you get?

Emily

…how to relax your special friend.

Tom

Okay, so it is actually…

Ari

Does skipping stones come up?

Tom

So it is actually not porn-related right now.

Ari

[Laughs.] Oh, interesting.

Tom

It is just very wholesome, like, how do I help my stressed friend, or what’s the best way to talk to a friend who has anxiety.

Several

Aww.

Tom

So this is actually not cursed.

Hallie

Wow.

Kyle

Anyways, I’m just saying acupuncture.

Tom

[Pinched.] Acupuncture? Oh dear.

Ari

Ant-cupuncture. With ants.

[Laughter.]

Kyle

Ant-cupuncture?!

Hallie

Agh, I don’t like it.

Ari

And pincers.

Hallie

I don’t like it.

Tom

Yeah, you just have the ants bite on specific points of the body.

Kyle

[Delighted.] I like that a lot, though.

Emily

That’s actually a thing with bees.

Ari

Yeah. They had used ant pincers before to hold things in ancient Egypt, so like that’s a thing.

Kyle

I really like—So Misha is using antupuncture.

Ari

Yeah.

Kyle

Let’s jump into that scene. That’s happening.

Ari

Oh god. I guess Misha will just sit next to Xoc and be like:

Ari (as Misha)

Uh, Xoc, I noticed that you are stressed, and I can see why. We had a really long couple of days, and we have some imminent dangers coming. But I think I have learned in the past that finding some time to relax is good for then having more energy to defeat those problems in the future. If you want to be left alone, I can do that, but if not, I wanted to maybe help you relax a bit? I learned some new ways of doing that. I just looked them up. I think this helps relax humans that are your special friends.

Tom (as Xoc)

Oh? Um… no, I’m sorry, Misha. I—

Ari (as Misha)

Oh no, you should not apologize to me. I understand. I feel like I have been like this a lot previously, so I understand.

Tom (as Xoc)

I appreciate it. And yeah, I’m happy to try something new. What did you learn?

[Bossa nova music begins.]

Ari

Misha will just slowly raise some of the ants and be like:

Ari (as Misha)

I believe it is called antcupuncture.

Tom (as Xoc)

O-Oh… What do the ants do?

Ari (as Misha)

Well, I believe you first need to lay on your belly.

Ari

[Laughs.]

Tom (as Xoc)

[Unsure.] Okay.

Tom

Xoc will do as he’s told.

Ari

Then slowly do some spa massages, or putting ants on relaxing spots. I actually don’t know acupuncture techniques.

[Laughter.]

Kyle

I don’t know either. I think you have to do it on bare skin…

Ari

Oh, that’s right.

[00:25:00]

Kyle

…so the Welkin suit now is just one of those open-back dresses.

Tom

[Laughs heavily and breathily until he coughs.]

Kyle

It’s just got an open oval in the back.

Hallie

It probably is, because that’s like the worst thing that suit could be.

Kyle

You could stick the ants on.

Tom

An open-back swimsuit…

Hallie

I hate it.

Emily

Now I’m just picturing it as the wrestling uniform.

Tom

See, I was thinking of Padme’s dress from Attack of the Clones in that really awkward balcony scene.

Hallie

The yellow one?

Tom

I don't remember the color, but I remember there’s one that looks like it’s a normal dress, then the camera changes and it’s suddenly completely open-back, and it always seemed startling to me, because it doesn’t look like it’s that kind of dress.

Hallie

I think that’s the yellow one.

[Music fades.]

Kyle

So, we’re gonna cut away.

Ari

Please.

Kyle

We’re gonna cut away as the ants get poured on. I won’t have Xoc, like, make a yelp or anything, because—

Ari

You have had it before, right Hallie? It’s not bad.

Hallie

It’s an experience. Uh…?

Ari

[Laughing.] Okay. I don't know. I’ve never had it before.

Hallie

It was bad for me, but that’s because I’m not a well person.

Tom

I am quite fearful of needles in real life, so I am not certain I would be so brave as to try it.

Ari

They also will do massage at the same time somehow.

Kyle

Okay.

Ari

Like the “oh, you have a knot,” or whatever.

Kyle

Well the open-back dress obviously doesn’t go to the shoulders, so you can massage his shoulders and stuff.

Ari

Yeah, so they will do that as well, somehow.

Emily

The longer we talk about it, it starts to get uncomfortable.

[Laughter.]

Kyle

So let’s cut away to the other three.

Hop, you’re still working on the boat, because I figure the boat will probably be the last big thing, so we might do one or two more scenes.

Tom

Yeah, yeah!

Hallie

Oh yeah.

Tom

We wanna get in on that boat ride when it’s done.

Hallie

Yeah.

Kyle

So Hop, you’re still working on the boat, but what is everyone else up to?

Emily

Will Ness eventually come to Elee who’s like freezing—

Tom

In her normal clothes!

Emily

—just standing in the water, half-frozen, very concerned for herself and for Ness?

Hallie

Probably, because I was going to ask—Kyle, can there be clams in this ocean?

Tom

Yeah, we just need to think of a pun name for them. Lams, they’re like wooly clams.

Hallie

[Cackles.]

Ari

Aww.

Hallie

Like, just “clam” with a B! Little clambs! I love it!

Kyle

We’ll call them c-lambs, because it’s C for the clam and then lamb for lamb.

Tom

Ooh, I love it.

Kyle

So c-lams, they are clams that are fuzzy.

Hallie

That’s so cute~!

Ari

That is very cute.

Hallie

I asked because when I was young I would swim in lakes and look for clams like all the time, and I liked to bring them back and show them to people. So Ness will do that with Elee. He’s looking for clams, c-lambs, and then he’ll swim back with his little kicks, his little doggy paddle.

[Giggling.]

Hallie (as Ness)

Look! Look! Look! Look! Look what I found!

Emily (as Elee)

[Stressed and strained.] That’s great, Ness. That’s so great.

Hallie (as Ness)

You should come out. You should come look for clams with me.

Emily (as Elee)

I sink, Ness…

Hallie (as Ness)

What?

Emily (as Elee)

I just… I sink!

Hallie (as Ness)

Well with THAT attitude, yeah, anybody would sink.

Emily

[Giggles.]

Hallie (as Ness)

What do you mean? I guess you are metal.

Emily (as Elee)

Yes.

Tom

I was just thinking about how this is like a SpongeBob routine. “Aw man, metal would sink,” as Ness, an entirely metal robot, just sits here floating.

Hallie

[Laughing.] Because Ness defies the laws of logic anytime I want him to.

Kyle

[Laughs.] He does have a floaty, though. He is wearing a floaty.

Hallie

He does.

Ari

That is true.

Hallie

He’s got a little inner tube, and then he was diving, so he wasn’t wearing swimmies.

Kyle

It’s an inner tube with a rope, so what happens is…

Ari

[Laughing.] Inner tube.

Kyle

…he just sinks to the bottom, grabs what he wants, and then just climbs back up the rope back into his inner tube.

Tom

That’s fucking incredible.

Hallie

He’s having such a good time with this setup. So with this setup he’ll go back and be like:

Hallie (as Ness)

Do you have an inner tube?

Emily (as Elee)

I don’t have an inner tube, and I don’t think it would hold me.

Hallie (as Ness)

Well, it would need to be bigger than mine, but I bet there’s an inner tube that would work.

Emily (as Elee)

That’s very nice of you, Ness, but I don’t even know where you got yours. I don’t think there’s a big one.

Hallie

Ness does some thinking and then goes:

Hallie (as Ness)

Huh. You know, I do know where I got it, but I have forgotten. There’s a lot of places in this here Weal of Baz, a lot of little hidey holes. I can’t re-find them all.

Kyle

Unit 909 goes back, realizes their bed is missing.

Hallie

[Laughs.]

Tom

[As a long sob.] Oh nooo!

Emily

[A laughing sob.] Nooo!

Tom

No…

Hallie

[Laughing.] No.

Tom

But now I just love the idea of a Roomba settling into an inner tube like a nest, just like doing the little turnaround that dogs do, but…

Hallie

Aw. But Roomba.

Tom

…but just rotating in space.

Hallie

That’s really cute.

Emily (as Elee)

Tell you what. I will make you a deal.

Hallie (as Ness)

I like deals.

Emily (as Elee)

I will come back out here in the deep, cold, frightening depths of the ocean…

Hallie (as Ness)

Uh-huh. Uh-huh.

[00:30:00]

Emily (as Elee)

…and look for c-lambs if you come with me and hang out with me on the beach on a quick break.

Hallie (as Ness)

Right now?

Emily (as Elee)

Well, I kind of had a surprise, but I mean… if you don’t want it, we don’t have to go right now.

Hallie (as Ness)

Wait! Wait. I never said—I just asked like right now, like I’m free, I just wanted to make sure that was what you wanted.

Kyle

[Laughs.]

Emily (as Elee)

Oh, okay. You just sounded a little, like, offended that we needed to do it right now.

Hallie (as Ness)

No, no, no.

Hallie

And he’s kicking his little tube to go into shore.

Emily

[Giggles.]

Hallie (as Ness)

No! No. Now is perfect for me, now that you mention it.

[Laughter.]

Emily

Elee brought—

Kyle

How did you get it again?

Emily

I had Ignatius Penny make it for me.

Kyle

Right. During One Neon Night you had him make this.

Emily

Mm-hmm. She obviously hasn’t been able to wrap this, so she like has one of her shawls and she wrapped it around, and it’s like wrapping.

Hallie

One of her many shawls.

Emily

And like hands it to Ness and waits kind of nervously for him to open it.

Hallie

Ness rips off the shawl in one fell swoop, because it’s a shawl. It’s not hard.

Emily

[Laughs.]

Kyle

The wind carries it out into the ocean.

Tom

[Slightly smiling.] No! X card.

Hallie

[Laughs.]

Emily

We don’t litter, Kyle.

Hallie

Yeah Kyle.

Tom

I refuse.

Emily

I don’t care about the shawl, but we don’t promote littering on this podcast.

Kyle

It flies up into the air and just flies back in the wind onto Elee’s shoulders.

Emily

Ness is holding, in his little hands, a tiny Ness-sized version of Elee’s folding chair.

Hallie

Awwww! He is confused for like a hot second, because this isn’t… He doesn’t know what he expected, but it wasn’t this. He kinda cocks his head at it and then looks up at Elee.

Hallie (as Ness)

Like your chair?

[Happy, gentle music begins.]

Emily (as Elee)

Yeah. I figured, you know, I don’t advertise this, but you know that I’m not as tall as all of the people that I fight. So, one of the things that I do is that I find ways to use my claws sometimes, but you know, before I had these I just had my chair to fight with, so I figured out how to hit people really hard with my chair even if they were bigger than me. I thought that, you know, if you wanted it and wanted me to show you how, I could maybe show you how to hit things… because I know you’re tough, but I also know that a little help is nice.

Hallie (as Ness)

You’ll teach me how to use it?

Emily (as Elee)

Oh yeah.

Hallie

In response to Elee’s yeah, Ness will do something semi-rare and just say a very direct:

Hallie (as Ness)

Thank you. … I like this.

Emily

Aww.

Hallie (as Ness)

Hey, and you know, you’ve always been the coolest of the bunch, here.

Hallie

And he gestures to everybody else.

Emily

[Laughs.]

Kyle

Hop has like five different tools in his mouth and is like “now what was the thing Sera was talking about?” As he talks one of the tools falls out.

[Music fades.]

Emily

“They’re all the thing!”

Hallie

[“Mouth full” mumbling.] “It’s gotta work, right?

Emily

“They’re all the thing, but none of them are the thing!”

Kyle

Xoc just has a pile of ants and glowing craves on his back, and Misha is sitting there with a terrifying focus giving him a massage.

Hallie

It’s just a weird, weird scene all around. He turns back to Elee.

Hallie (as Ness)

What can we hit with this?

Emily (as Elee)

Everything.

Hallie (as Ness)

[Emphatically.] Ohh!

Kyle

And when the training is done, to the delight of Ness, and to the horror of every other living creature in the Ninth World…

[Beach resort music begins.]

Ness is now able to use a medium weapon.

Hallie

Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!

Kyle

Which is this metal folding chair.

Hallie

Yes. Yes. Yes. Putting that on my Hop character sheet in the bottom part. Ness can now use a medium weapon.

[Music swells and carries into the announcements.]

Kyle

Hello and welcome to the announcement break for Quest Friends, Episode 77: The Obsidian Cloud, Part 4. I’m Kyle, your GM, and our intro song is Friends by Miracle of Sound.

I hope you’re enjoying this nice, calm, just kind of fun tangent-filled beach episode. I thought it would be nice to have something that’s a bit lighter and sillier before we start really moving into the finale of this campaign.

[00:35:00]

As part of the silliness of this episode everyone described a beach outfit, and some of those outfits included very specific references. So, if you’re curious what those references look like and you aren’t quite sure how to search for them, in the description to this episode you can find a link to a little Google folder where I put in references for I think Xoc’s, Hop’s, and Misha’s outfits.

In addition to that announcement, I actually want to talk about our schedule a little bit, because we’ve got five finale episodes—originally four, but one of them went so long that we had to add another one. They’re big, they’re bold, and I want to release them weekly… which means our schedule is gonna be a bit weird for the next two months.

So, in order to explain what we’re gonna be doing on this feed while I am editing those final episodes, I have actually brought in a few guests, so I’m gonna let them do their thing and then we’ll get right back to the episode. So without any further ado…

 [Magical music begins.]

Hallie (as Anastasia)

[Clears throat.] Hello everyone, and on behalf of the nation of Ancuan may I, Queen Anastasia Brackleberry, welcome you to TJ Blaze’s Dinos, Drive-Ins & Dives catering hall which so graciously agreed to host this conference.

[Music ends abruptly.]

Hallie (as Sera)

It was nice of them to honor your coupon even though it expired.

Hallie (as Anastasia)

Sera please, every time you interrupt me my speech gets worse.

Hallie (as Sera)

This is nothing compared to what it’s gonna be like.

[Music returns.]

Hallie (as Anastasia)

[Sighs, clears throat.] I am overjoyed that such esteemed dignitaries were able to attend and hope that we may all come to an understanding regarding this peace treat-y.

[Music ends abruptly.]

[Giggles.] No, no, that won’t go over well at all considering the council’s fears, and Qi, and the Brackleberry Brigade.

Hallie (as Sera)

[Chewing something crunchy.] I thought it was good.

Hallie (as Anastasia)

Wait. What are you eating?

Hallie (as Sera)

Nothing… [Crunches loudly.]

Hallie (as Anastasia)

[Emotional.] I told you to stop eating the Snapoas.

[Cookie Crew Theme begins.]

This is going to be hard enough without you eating the cornerstone of our diplomatic strategy. We want our guests to be happy.

Hallie (as Sera)

Then why are you giving them Snapoas?

Hallie (as Anastasia)

[Long whine.] Oh… you’re right, you’re right. Here, eat the rest of them. God, this is going to be such a disaster!

Hallie (as Sera)

From what I understand, they usually are.

Hallie

Sera wasn’t there for the other two Cookie Crews, but hopefully you were. In the third installment of the series, which takes place a few weeks after the Prodigious back in Chapter 4 of the main campaign, Rei and Sera and Anastasia, and of course the Brackleberry Brigade, are ready to use their diplomatic prowess to aid in the formation of a peace treaty among several nations where tensions are running high due to interferences from the Jagged Dream.

So join us all at TJ Blaze’s Dinos, Drive-Ins & Dives starting on Monday, June 7 and continuing every other Monday through June and July, because these episodes will actually be released instead of the main campaign for a while, while Kyle edits all the finale stuff.

There is a lot of exciting stuff coming, so we hope you’re all looking forward to that, because we sure are, but we also hope you enjoy The Cookie 3.

[Music carries out of the announcements.]

Kyle

So the day continues. You started in the morning. We’re now getting to the sun hitting the height of the sky around noon, not that you would notice in how overcast it is. Finally Hop, you have finished making this boat something that can sail on water… you think.

Hallie

[Stammers.] Like, statistically, there’s like a 95%. He wouldn’t take people on this boat if it was less than 95%.

Tom

I mean, that’s… P value.

Kyle

It’s a P value of less than .05.

Hallie

It is, it is less than .05. He ran the ANOVA. He ran the Tukey post-hoc test and the Bonferroni correction. Those are words I know.

Kyle

The difference between this and a piece of sheet metal is statistically significant.

Hallie

Yeah! That’s all you need.

Tom

[Amused.] The differences between this boat and a boat that sinks are not due to chance alone is the conclusion of this paper.

Emily

[Laughs.]

Hallie

They are vast. The captain of the Titanic said “this ship is unsinkable.” Hopper says there’s a 95% chance it won’t sink. They are very different. That is also a statistically significant difference.

Ari

That is very, very fair.

Tom

Explain with this reason why this ship is not the Titanic. Number 1: We will not hit an iceberg and flood seven of twelve compartments.

Hallie

[Laughs.]

Kyle

Luckily you don’t have any icebergs in this region. You have nicebergs, which let you know when you’re about to hit them.

Tom

Aww~

Ari

Oh that’s cute.

Hallie

Aww, that’s so polite!

Kyle

Unfortunately the Ninth World version of the Titanic did in fact hit an iceberg who was like “ooh, ooh, I’m so sorry. Ooh, no… oh.”

Hallie

Should’ve gone around me there.

Tom

I thought WE were on the Ninth World version of the Titanic!

[Laughter.]

We were on that! That happened in this game.

Hallie

He’s got a point.

Kyle

I just really like the gag of, like—

Tom

Every world has a ship that they decide is unsinkable.

Kyle

A niceberg getting distracted and being like “oh no, I’m so sorry. Oh god, geez,” as everyone screams.

[Chuckling.]

Tom

“Oh geez. Guys, you better look out, there. You’re coming in pretty fast… Are you sure you guys can turn that fast?”

[Screaming crowd SFX.]

“Oh… Oh gosh. Oh no. Golly gee.”

[00:40:00]

Hallie

[Laughs.]

Kyle

Alright. Yeah, so I’ll let you announce to everyone else that it’s floating and figure out what you’re gonna do.

Hallie

Oh, okay. So Hop does the final nail and he looks at it and he thinks “what would Sera find at fault with this?” and he can’t think of anything.

Hallie (as Hopper)

I think I did it…

Hallie

Then he will push it into the water a little bit to see if it floats in the shallows, and then when it does, and does not appear to be sinking, he’ll jump into it to make further sure it doesn’t sink with the weight of a living person on it, and after that is when he shouts to his friends on the beach.

Hallie (as Hopper)

I think I got the boat working! I mean, floating. I fixed the boat. It’s floating right now. I think it’s gonna float with all of us, if anybody wants to go sailing.

Tom (as Xoc)

Oh…

Emily (as Elee)

[Terrified.] Did you just jump in that without knowing?

Hallie (as Hopper)

Well yeah, because it’s real shallow. I can touch here, it’s real shallow. I think it’ll hold all of us out deeper, too, but I won’t go too deep, Elee.

Tom (as Xoc)

Do you see the, um… that spur of rock out there, at the edge? I’ve never been past that point. I lived here for years and I just… I never went so far away from the Weal. We didn’t really have a working boat, and I sometimes listened to what Horus and Jaykell said, so I didn’t climb the rocks too much. I’ve never seen what’s on the other side of that. I think that’d be really nice if we explored what’s past there.

Hallie (as Hopper)

Yeah, let’s find out.

Tom (as Xoc)

Do you want to come, Misha?

Ari (as Misha)

Oh! Yeah, of course I would. I was just thinking that it’s funny, because I remember Elee once said that we were all in one boat and we are once again going to be in one boat.

Tom (as Xoc)

Yeah… Yeah, that is right. Are you okay, Elee? Do you want to stay behind?

Hallie

Before Elee can answer, Ness actually tugs on one of her many shawls, because she’s still in her normal clothes.

Hallie (as Ness)

I know it might not be big enough, but you can hold onto it. Do you want my inner tube?

Tom

Aww~

Emily

Aww! [Sobs.]

Hallie

He’s holding it up to her.

Hallie (as Ness)

It worked for me! Like, really well.

Emily (as Elee)

And I want it to keep working for you, Ness. Keep it on when we go on the boat… all of us.

Hallie (as Ness)

Yay!

Tom (as Xoc)

All on a boat together!

Tom

Xoc is going to pump his arms at that a little bit, because he wants to get people excited, and he’s happy to see Elee getting on the boat.

Ari (as Misha)

If it helps, Elee, my scarf is very comforting, so if you want something to make you less afraid, I can give it to you for this. Well, our scarf, really.

Tom

[Emotional noises.]

Emily (as Elee)

How about you just sit next to me?

Ari (as Misha)

I can do that. I would love to.

Emily (as Elee)

I’m gonna let everybody else get on first, though, just in case I’m a little bit too heavy, because there are a significant number of us all getting on this boat.

Hallie (as Hopper)

No. No Elee, I ran the numbers. I did the math. A boat made with this kind of metal, soldered in this way, this will hold like 500 pounds. I learned that from Sera.

Tom

[Pinched, amused.] That’s like two people.

Ari

[Laughs.]

Hallie

Five hundred pounds?

Emily (as Elee)

How much do you think I weigh?

Kyle

Elee alone—

Emily (as Elee)

Because it is a significant amount.

Ari

Misha is also kinda heavy.

Hallie

No, no-no, this is a Hallie thing.

Emily (as Elee)

I have like part of a house in my bones.

Hallie

It’ll hold like a thousand pounds! Insert correct mathematical formula!

Emily

Okay, say the average weight of an adult male… [Laughs.]

Kyle

Just say a ton. Just say a ton. Two thousand pounds is enough.

Hallie (as Hopper)

It’ll hold a ton, like a metric ton, 2,000 pounds. It’ll hold a metric ton.

Emily (as Elee)

Uh… okay. I’m still gonna let everybody get in first, though. I’ll push it off. I’m the buffest.

Hallie

[Smiling.] Whatever. It’s fine. I did the math right, and I said correct numbers that definitely made contextual sense, so we can all leave me alone now.

[Skeptical giggling.]

Tom

So we’re all in the boat together.

Kyle

So you all get in the boat, and it pushes out.

[Wave and boat engine SFX begin.]

A little bit, a little bit… further and further… to Elee’s horror, as the ground beneath them gets deeper and deeper, but to Xoc’s excitement, because as the distance to the seafloor increases so does the distance from the Weal. Not that you want to get away from the Weal, but like, you want to go further out into the sea. After a little bit you make it past that one little inland jut and you are in unknown waters.

[SFX changes to gentler waves.]

Tom

While we’re sailing at this point, Xoc is going to squeeze Misha’s hand a little bit and turn to the rest of the party and say:

Tom (as Xoc)

I’m sorry if I’ve been a little bit out of it today, but thank you all for being here with me, for everything we’ve done. I know this might be the last time we get a break before, well… before a lot of things happen, so if we can’t do anything to work right now, I want to make sure this is a really good memory, that we make today worth it, so… so thank you.

[00:45:00]

[Gentle, emotional music begins.]

I’m very happy to be here on this boat with you.

Ari (as Misha)

Thank you as well, Xoc. You do not need to worry about being out of it or stressed. I hope my massage helped you. But I also wanted to say that I wouldn’t want this day to have gone any other way, and I do really like us being all here and all we have lived through together. So, thank you all as well.

I first met you because I wanted to have adventures with humans, I thought I did not know them, and I had read adventures about them before, but I can say that the one that I’ve lived with all of you has been the best one, so I just want to say that I am really glad that you’re the humans I happened to meet.

Tom (as Xoc)

Yeah… I wouldn’t trade any of you for the world.

Hallie

Hop will give a really soft fond smile.

Hallie (as Hopper)

I’m really glad we all met. You all mean a lot to me, and it’s been great. I mean, we’ve had… Things that have happened aren’t great, but it’s been great handling them with all of you, so… I want to thank everyone, too.

Kyle

Ness, did you have anything?

Hallie

Ness has been sitting on his little chair that he set up, like a little deck chair on the boat.

Hallie (as Ness)

You know, before Xoc shanghaied me, my destiny—my Ness-tiny was to be found and adopted by a long-lost relative who was A: rich, B: wealthy, C: loaded, and D: has a lot of money.

Kyle

[Laughs.]

Hallie (as Ness)

And you know, that relative probably can’t find me now, because I’m on this boat with you guys… and that’s fine.

Emily

[Happy sobs.] Aww.

Hallie (as Ness)

I have no complaints.

Emily (as Elee)

Since, you know… we’re doing the thank-yous and all of that, I…

[Music ends.]

[Softly.] Thank you for being my family.

[Gentle guitar music from the Heroes of Navarene picnic begins.]

Tom

Xoc is going to hug Elee at that.

Ari

Misha will also do that, as well as the scarf.

Hallie

Yeah, Hop’s joining.

Tom

Group hug. Group hug!

Emily

Group hug.

Hallie

Group hug on a boat!

Tom

[Chuckles.]

Kyle

As you all get into a hug, the boat drifts out a little bit further, now beyond where the overcast skies of the beach obscure the sun.

Tom

Xoc is gonna take a look out at the—now that they’ve rounded that spur of rock—this new stretch of coast they’ve discovered, and even though it is just rocky and unremarkable as everything leading up alongside it, Xoc will just say:

Tom (as Xoc)

What a beautiful discovery.

[Music swells and carries out to the bloopers.]

Ari

[Laughing.] All I can think of is the “oh, it’s Willy and his whales, we are saved.” Like, all bursting into the small room.

Tom

I would call Willy and his whales back to fight the Apocrita if they had appeared in this game. I want that out there.

Hallie

[Laughing.] I don’t want any whales. I’ll take Willy.

Ari

We should’ve included the narwhal flying things from the Prodigious.

Tom

Oh my god! You didn’t add the qwhales!

Hallie

Oh yeah, the qwhales!

Kyle

I don't know how I forgot them.

Tom

Anyway. Instant yes for qwhales. Add them to the list and put me down as yes.

Emily

[Giggles.]

Kyle

Yeah, they’re in the list.

Tom

Good.

Kyle

And no one can say no.

Hallie

What?

Tom

We veto your veto, Hallie.

Kyle

And Q-BO has volunteered to help with them fixing stuff up there as well, so Q-BO is not with you this episode, because he’s not part of the party and I need to get him away.

Ari

He can be chilling with other people in the Weal.

Tom

Q-BO and Jaykell and Reference Section are hitting it off somewhere.

Kyle

Oh yeah.

Emily

Hey uh, real quick, did we bring oars?

Hallie

It’s a sailboat.

Emily

It’s a sailboat? Okay. I thought it was just a boat.

Ari

I understood “did we bring Horus” and I was like—

[Laughter.]

Tom

Oh no.

Ari

“Why?!”

Kyle

He’s like the king from Wind Waker. He just is the King of Lions. He is the boat.

Tom

Wait! Wait. Is the boat the king?! Is the boat Zelda’s dad?! Is that a twist in Wind Waker?

Hallie

[Snickers.]

Tom

I didn’t know that! I’ve never played Wind Waker!

Kyle

I’m so sorry. Yeah, the king is the boat. That’s why in Hyrule Warriors he fights with a sail.

Tom

Interesting.

Kyle

Anyways.

Tom

Anyways.

Kyle

The point is, Horus is not there, the king of Hyrule is not there, you are in a boat that is a sailboat.

[Laughter.]

Hallie

The king of Hyrule is missing.

Kyle

You do actually scrape over. We can see just the peak of Hyrule Castle poking out underneath the water as some craves and some c-lambs float around by it.

[00:50:00]

Hallie

[Laughing.] Atlantis was Hyrule all along.

Tom

Ugh.

[Someone shrieks in the distance.]

Ari

What?

[Laughter.]

Tom

Where did that come from?

Hallie

My roommate is playing a game on the PlayStation 5, but I don't know what it is.

Ari

[Laughing.] I just love, like, Misha’s saying this heartfelt speech and then just a scream in the background.

Emily

[Laughs.] “AH!”

Tom

We’ll have to find out later what Emily is doing.

Hallie

She’s playing The Last of Us.

Several

Ohh…

Ari

Yeah, okay, that makes sense.

Hallie

Yeah-yeah-yeah.

Ari (as Misha)

Yeah. I just want to say that I am really glad that you are the humans I happened to meet.

Tom (as Xoc)

Yeah. I wouldn’t trade any of you for the world.

Emily, Hallie’s roommate

[In the distance, shouting.] Oh my god!

[Laughter.]

Ari

I need to know later which specific part she’s in.

Tom

Yeah. We need to know exactly which part she’s at.

Ari

Because I have played this game, like… she’s hunted by clickers or something. That would be my bet.

Kyle

[Sighs in delight, recovering.]

Hallie

I have no idea, but I will investigate.

Tom

These are all important questions.