Turnaround Big Top

[00:00:00] .

[00:00:30] What?

[00:00:31] What?

[00:00:32] Just the long awkward pause you pull up notes.

[00:00:41] Okay, but I don't know.

[00:00:42] Because it's a special are we doing the like I'm Halle and I'm Ari and I'm Emily and

[00:00:46] I'm Kyle.

[00:00:47] Oh that's right.

[00:00:48] You are running it now.

[00:00:49] And our characters are these things and they have names and abilities and pronouns.

[00:00:55] Probably yeah.

[00:00:56] Yeah.

[00:00:57] So what do you usually say when you introduce because you go first.

[00:01:01] You're like I'm Kyle and I'm here with my four best friends and we're telling a story

[00:01:06] but I'm Halle this time and I'm here with just three of my best friends.

[00:01:10] Yeah.

[00:01:11] And it's April Fools and we're playing under the neighborhood, but it's me this time

[00:01:16] running the game because it's April Fools day.

[00:01:19] I hope everybody was like wow, I really want to listen to Kyle GM and then they clicked

[00:01:23] on this and were like oh my goodness.

[00:01:25] Halle, what a top tier April Fools prank even better.

[00:01:30] Wow.

[00:01:31] Fucking out.

[00:01:33] I can leave.

[00:01:35] I'm editing an episode right now.

[00:01:37] I can go.

[00:01:39] No stay.

[00:01:40] So anyway listeners, I'm DMing today.

[00:01:43] I'm Halle, pronouns she heard.

[00:01:45] I'll be playing several characters.

[00:01:46] Unfortunately, I think every single one that I made is he him might have to fix that.

[00:01:54] Who wants to go first?

[00:01:56] Wait, what is the order?

[00:01:58] The order I'm usually last.

[00:01:59] So it's so we should go opposite.

[00:02:01] We should go opposite.

[00:02:03] Opposite day.

[00:02:04] Yeah.

[00:02:05] So it would be Emily then are you then me because I'm normally first.

[00:02:07] Uh-huh.

[00:02:08] It's true.

[00:02:09] Okay.

[00:02:10] Um, for a second I forgot my own name.

[00:02:14] I'm Emily, they them and I will be playing your project.

[00:02:23] Or being you possessive, you're not your that's not his name.

[00:02:31] You are our grandpa.

[00:02:32] Yeah, that means great grandfather in Polish because our clowns are Polish sort of I guess.

[00:02:41] Yeah.

[00:02:42] Your clowns might not be Polish but the clowns are generally Polish or Polish people are

[00:02:47] generally clowns in here after he's a guardian who cast spells.

[00:02:53] It's going to be so easy for me to just cut out the any here after and just class through

[00:02:59] that.

[00:03:00] No, insult the entire I am I am Polish.

[00:03:05] Oh, oh, oh, oh, I am playing my clown is not Polish I guess because I'm basing my clown

[00:03:14] off of Mexican clown.

[00:03:16] I am going to be playing Vity Briso the clown who is the weird who takes up attention

[00:03:24] he him.

[00:03:25] I am record le eike that's Kyle Decker in reverse.

[00:03:31] I'm Kyle, he him tried today.

[00:03:34] I'm playing Michael with Chowski clown lawyer.

[00:03:38] The slapstick who works the system he him.

[00:03:41] Alright, Brzo with Chowski, Prajadek, Yaklowns, you're at the clown town made spring semi spectacular

[00:03:49] fair.

[00:03:50] There's still snow on the mountain peaks and a brisk chill in the air because you are

[00:03:53] in the mountains but the yearly makeshift carnival is a sure sign that spring is coming

[00:03:58] to clown town.

[00:03:59] You three have participated in the scavenger hunt as a team I'm just throwing you together.

[00:04:04] You can decide how friendly you are with one another if you hated each other during

[00:04:08] the scavenger hunt or not.

[00:04:10] It is up to you but you won, isn't that exciting?

[00:04:14] You won the scavenger hunt and this is huge because the prize is being presented by none

[00:04:18] other than master card designer clown read himself.

[00:04:23] Clown read.

[00:04:25] Clown read is a tall wizardy looking man in very long robes.

[00:04:32] He gets up to the stage and he's about to announce the prize so he'll oh wonderful performance

[00:04:37] from all teams this year but a better than wonderful performance from do remind me

[00:04:42] what was your team name?

[00:04:43] Our team was working for Michael with Chowski and associates LLC.

[00:04:47] As you can see we have pulling out my comically large clipboard was not engraved in the clown

[00:04:54] code of ethics just flipping through as you can see I have all the paperwork here for

[00:04:58] this festive occasion that we all participated in in order to follow clown ethic number seven

[00:05:06] I will appear in as many clown shows as I possibly can this is a genuine code of ethics

[00:05:11] that I will put in the description.

[00:05:14] And just that whole thing your team name.

[00:05:16] I come on and man no that's not our team name did I agree to that team name?

[00:05:23] I didn't you know I don't remember signing a signing any any documents saying that I

[00:05:31] agreed to this name of yours.

[00:05:33] I can't read.

[00:05:36] So we have covered this before briszo as clown of code of ethics number two says I will

[00:05:41] try to remain anonymous while in makeup and costume as a clown though there may be circumstances

[00:05:45] when it is not reasonably possible to do so.

[00:05:48] I've course got an exception for this law but as all of you could not use your legal names

[00:05:53] on the documents and I cannot legally share them lest I break your anonymity I suppose

[00:05:59] you are technically back me into a corner just like you back me into a corner and participating

[00:06:04] in this in the first place.

[00:06:06] I mean it's not a matter of names I mean everybody knows that my name is yours briszo I don't

[00:06:13] know what you're talking about about an actual non-clown name you know it's just another

[00:06:19] person really no I'm just saying that's you that our team name is not your name where

[00:06:26] does our what were our names come why is your name first in the end so team not your name

[00:06:31] I would like to present this year's prize limited edition one of a kind clown cards designed

[00:06:37] by me clown read which can legally be used in any enchantment the bringering tournaments

[00:06:42] lucky win for you many people have sought these cards so much so that we had to keep them

[00:06:48] under lock and key before presenting them right on stage and then um clown read will with

[00:06:53] a flourish remove a curtain from like a little pedestal thing that's on the stage where

[00:06:58] you guys are and it goes whoosh but then the crowd gasps because the display podium is empty

[00:07:04] and clown read screams the cards they're gone who could have foreseen such a tragedy oh

[00:07:11] no now I have no prize to present to team not your name the winning contestants when he says

[00:07:17] who could have foreseen such a tragedy Michael Wachowski raises a finger like he's gonna

[00:07:23] feel like you know on this page I and then just you just puts it back down again I tried to tell

[00:07:30] you the youths cool against there has been a concerningly low input of youth participants in

[00:07:38] this as opposed to usual which I presume is why us adults participated in it in the first place

[00:07:44] the youth no longer understand what clown is and I told you that they would steal clowning

[00:07:53] and I would like to use my move it's not actually allowed to be done retro act in

[00:08:04] boom but I wanted to see if I could get away with it I mean you do have you do have the fun parent

[00:08:09] running today so right I was gonna give it to you but like are you warning just like the general

[00:08:15] crowd about the dangers of the youths of today I feel like I cornered this announcer at some point

[00:08:20] and was like the youths are going to ruin this so you did prejudice you did warn me I should have

[00:08:27] sought your council before thank you yes is my festival well is it I feel like not really but

[00:08:39] Pradadek is really really old yeah so he was a very early clown an early clown and he feels that

[00:08:50] most of these holidays are technically for him including the clown town mid spring semi-specacular

[00:08:57] fair yes so is he dead or is he just okay I wasn't sure if he was just a very very old live man

[00:09:05] no he's a ghost I mean maybe a poltergeist just because that's fun you can be whatever you want to

[00:09:10] be because I'm a cranky ghost that's basically a poltergeist before we continue can we describe

[00:09:16] what our characters look like yeah I'm sorry I didn't realize I don't know okay yeah I'm sorry

[00:09:22] to interrupt it's just that's okay describe what I didn't give you the shit it's important for

[00:09:28] Kyle specifically describe what your characters look like I'm a fucking eyeball I am a giant sentient

[00:09:36] eyeball I am the eyeball type of dead who died and not keeping my eye on the ball so I am an eyeball

[00:09:44] with curly orange hair a boring brown suit with like spindly little limbs so the suit is really

[00:09:53] just the collar and then it's got arms and legs out of it and then instead of a bow tie just a giant

[00:09:59] red clown nose but other than that I am probably three feet tall maybe four half of that is just eyeball

[00:10:07] I am just an old man clown bright green hair really on-camped clothes definitely might or my

[00:10:16] not be drunk at any point in time aesthetic of clown a little bit like I guess cross the I don't know

[00:10:22] I don't know the Simpsons I don't know if he's drunk all the time or not no Crosstis Crosstis drunk

[00:10:27] all the time yeah which is mind you a violation of clown commandment number three I will neither drink

[00:10:34] alcoholic beverages nor smoke while in makeup or clown costume also I will not drink alcoholic

[00:10:39] beverages prior to any clown appearances holding cuz I was gonna I was gonna say what your brother

[00:10:45] is a lawyer so you're probably fine I'm mad at you but I'll protect you I'm just a very old man

[00:10:56] but transparent in probably like medieval looking clothes nice they're simple look at like a

[00:11:04] tunic of some kind yeah that's all I'm just an old man just an old man a dead old man just a

[00:11:11] dead old man a dead old man who is neither a phantom nor ghost he is just the angrier combination of

[00:11:17] the two he's a foe or a gantam you okay yeah he's a gantob fine either way clown read is terrified

[00:11:26] that he's not shown you the proper deference as the person for whom this holiday is apparently

[00:11:32] an honor of thank you yes he gets it oh bridge dick I am just so very sorry and we don't even have

[00:11:39] the price for you we don't even have oh I will fix this it's good Johnny is okay I understand

[00:11:49] no one appreciates prejudic anymore I appreciate prejudic but listen this and I shall report

[00:11:55] this matter to the proper authorities but I'm afraid law enforcement does not bite up to speed

[00:12:02] if you'd like your prize you'll have to accept undertaking the task of finding the cards

[00:12:07] yourselves fun fact I put clown noise sound effect in between all of those puns but I didn't I

[00:12:13] don't have a clown horn so I can't do it I got a booboo sailor no three kazoo's an automaton and

[00:12:26] sonic the hedgehog pass dispenser I don't think any of those can make the noise I know I wanted

[00:12:32] a very specific noise anyway you'll have to accept undertaking the task of finding the cards

[00:12:39] yourselves but no seriously law enforcement they they don't like this holiday very much so I don't

[00:12:44] think it's going to be much help but if you if you do want to find the prize yourself the very special

[00:12:50] cards I designed the one of a kind cards that are legal to enter in a chat with the brungering

[00:12:56] tournaments please please at a shneeg left and then two sisters come forward one is very tall

[00:13:04] with silver hair and the second it's just like a little lion is it a little lion boy like is this

[00:13:13] like I love what call is doing it's like kill herself like it's like like is this someone in

[00:13:19] a costume is this a dead person is this a necroman I don't know I just wrote lion is this just a

[00:13:26] little boy with a very large beard it's a little boy with a lion mane let's go with that like imagine

[00:13:33] what you see on the stage in the lion king musical on Broadway but it's not a costume you did specify

[00:13:40] that no okay is it on your type of one dead that's just a little kid with a lion he's just a

[00:13:46] little lion he's like a magical little lion a magical little lion are named after me uh well

[00:13:54] progedeck I also think that this festival is a really a pillar of our community and I think

[00:14:02] that the cards missing and the enforcers not really caring about this festival really highlights

[00:14:09] the incoming decline of our society so I will help with these car retrieval things and I

[00:14:15] I do it for you so that you don't feel that we don't appreciate the older days as you as you would say

[00:14:22] kocchani good boy yes thank you thank you yes you are my vnook now uh no I out of care care

[00:14:33] do not know what that means but I assume that's little boy vnook is um grandson oh I am cute I am

[00:14:41] now adopted I believe legally that would not be the hush you know what we are keeping our eye off

[00:14:49] the ball in this moment so and I take my giant clipboard which is again the size of my body

[00:14:55] and I just stick it into a coat pocket it just goes in their effortlessly because one of my moves

[00:15:01] is big ol mallet where I can just pull my signature item out of any pocket I would like to

[00:15:07] reach towards your pocket I can touch I apologize sir but that uh that pocket is a confidential

[00:15:15] property of michael waschowski and associates LLC but I am your prosthetic I can look in pocket

[00:15:23] sir you are definitively not my progetec my brotherly associate here came to me and said hey we found

[00:15:33] this sad clown man wandering the streets yelling at happy children is grandson let's do something

[00:15:43] with him he is your brother so you are grandson oh and my aunt oh come on is this this this

[00:15:52] matter you are really going to be this rule this this man who has now he symbolizes the good

[00:16:01] classic times of our land of this nowadays we have no pirates we do not burn things or people

[00:16:13] it was good fun uh well you know there's some things that definitely have improved for the

[00:16:18] better so not everything has uh necessarily helped stay as it was uh the little boys would whip

[00:16:26] the little girls with with little sticks you know those those things are are fun but but our other

[00:16:33] ball is like the fair for example are they would throw people in the lake and then when they come out

[00:16:39] we throw them back you know i mean i think you have a point here on uh next today little girls

[00:16:47] with little boys with sticks the little non binary children are free to roam

[00:16:58] i just think to myself i need to make sure that this man cannot get that card because if i

[00:17:04] understand it is a magical card right no actually it is just a fancy collector's edition card they

[00:17:09] were just trading cards clown cards they're just trading cards but i named them after cloud cards

[00:17:13] and added one in are they of us no they're just like cards why is not a project deck well you see

[00:17:20] because uh you're not an element or like a like a like a fairy you do not know that i am not a fairy

[00:17:27] are you a fairy no you see the designs they speak to me and they're just so very coveted in certain

[00:17:33] tournaments many people would like to own these cards which is why i'm surprised they've been stolen

[00:17:39] i use for what i have understood these are some cards that are tradition right from the fair and

[00:17:47] they are there's always been a thing in this clown fun fair this was a new venture this year the

[00:17:55] scavenger hunt rise is usually a gift card and before that before what was it prejudic

[00:18:02] vodka vodka i want that about all swear to go in all these and grotes mr clown read uh i look at you

[00:18:12] know the some of the children around me i am deeply concerned about what will happen if these two

[00:18:17] men are what loose on the town no no no no in fact i will bring clown read close and say i will be

[00:18:22] honest there i am deeply concerned about what will be happened if these two men are set loose on the

[00:18:27] town on their own it wouldn't be possible to get a gift card or some other kind of supplement is there

[00:18:32] in addition like like a like a reward for finding the cards just something so they don't have to

[00:18:38] search for the cards i i i'd have to speak with the chair uh yes the chair as we know it's very bad at

[00:18:45] speaking back because the i i'm now adding the lore that the head of a clown down is just a wooden

[00:18:53] chair in a room it's just one chair a load of it it takes a while and as you know it can take some time

[00:19:00] to get an answer from the chair gentlemen we are on a quest to recover these three cards we must

[00:19:07] engage ourselves in all eight tenants of the clown code of ethics so before we begin shall you

[00:19:13] all repeat after me why no right so this is i am very very confident you'll find the cards should

[00:19:20] you need any assistance my assistance shniyeg and lef and then once again gestures to the tall

[00:19:27] silver hair to person i'm gonna say shniyeg is a is a raf that sounds like fun and that sounds

[00:19:33] right and then lef is still just a lion who i haven't decided a little lion a little lion boy

[00:19:40] he gestures to shniyeg and lef my assistants have been on duty all day so i'm sure they can

[00:19:45] answer your questions and help you determine where to start i must go speak with the chair

[00:19:50] then clown leaves little jet scroll little kolaani i see you soon i have to i have to what's

[00:19:59] think you would polish oh god google translate please help me bedog did no that's not right jacquée

[00:20:05] jacquée friends jacquée that's thank you all right and you are left alone with shniyeg and lef

[00:20:13] where is my egg lef your egg my egg uh i don't i don't have any eggs old man

[00:20:19] this is the problem with the youth well they didn't tell me to have any eggs no eggs for

[00:20:24] proud to dig they didn't tell me to have any eggs for project they just i was just supposed to stay

[00:20:28] right here and i did it i don't know what happened to the cards you have honey no you have growth

[00:20:35] i don't have any food you have vodka yeah second that question he's drink we're not soliciting vodka

[00:20:43] from the children if child has vodka better i have vodka than child has vodka yeah i think that's

[00:20:50] a solid logic a child do you have vodka my little nukki c and then shniyeg cuts him off and he's like

[00:21:04] no he does not have vodka well uh uh uh uh progedeck i think you know to do our due diligence here

[00:21:11] on looking for these cards they might be on the bottom of of bottles so you know if we find any

[00:21:19] potential alcohol looking bottles and you know there might be cards there so you know we can just

[00:21:25] both words towards uh grabbing those and emptying them around not that i know as you kid do not have it

[00:21:33] but you know if you happen to find some i'm sorry are you suggesting that you're going to find

[00:21:39] the missing clown cards at the bottom of a bottle you don't let no stone on turn left no bottle on

[00:21:47] bird it's what ice always say what and to think clown read was trusting you with getting the cards

[00:21:56] this is this is like what chous get this point is half tempted to leave this part

[00:22:01] you just leave up with the children i just leave the party you know for example for example i

[00:22:09] think sometimes there's uh escape rooms right and on you know you can find any sort of clue in

[00:22:16] any placing on escape rooms so why wouldn't a card for example being any of those places i'm

[00:22:23] just trying to cover our our bases here because this is an open air fair and no one is going to put

[00:22:29] a rare card they've just stolen the bottom of a wet icky bottle well that's what do they want you

[00:22:35] to think well by chance child do you know where they would put a card of that sort where they'd put

[00:22:40] a card of that sort just call you are not very helpful a very impressive imitation of the chair

[00:22:55] i agree but we are not here for that kind of clonery we're here for other kinds of clonery yes laugh

[00:23:03] come more serious snieg what do you know what do we know well i've been here myself purposely the

[00:23:10] entire time attempting to overt such a disaster and i have no idea how they would have managed

[00:23:16] to steal the cards right from under our noses you are not good at your job i take offense to that

[00:23:23] but you said this is your job and you did not do just but nothing happened nothing happened for me

[00:23:30] to do but it did they are gone yeah but like i don't know you know like like like like snieg like um

[00:23:39] you didn't fight you like and and like see we go now

[00:23:49] tragic starts walking away like hey where are you going you are not helpful

[00:23:55] well that's true well i'm not discarding the potential of the bottle part but you know still

[00:24:02] any other places snieg where you think these rare cards might be are any any any clues any any

[00:24:10] something that you know we can use to guide our investigation here hmm well after a cursory look at

[00:24:18] the crime scene i suppose is what you'd call it there was nothing really a mess except for

[00:24:24] you see this drape that was over the cover of the podium and he's holding it now the only thing

[00:24:29] that i noticed when clown read tore it off with a great flourish is that there are these tiny little

[00:24:35] marks on the edge of it and he holds it up and it looks like the drape isn't broken but there's

[00:24:40] like little bite marks almost when something little was biting it but you perhaps have a problem with

[00:24:46] the necrotermites i don't believe we have an in necrotermites uh left left

[00:24:52] ah

[00:24:55] i like so intriguing marks i'm gonna walk up to them and i'm gonna feel them around and i want to

[00:25:01] roll understand to see if i can figure out like what mondies came from okay so that's somehow

[00:25:09] that's still a failure i have plus three but i rolled a one and a two so that's a six no sure does

[00:25:16] look like a necromon alright can i try as well yeah i'm gonna try to replicate the marks by you know

[00:25:24] how people will try to like bite on a coin yeah the little pupil in my eyeball turns into teeth

[00:25:30] and just bites down awful awful terrible no and then comes back to a few balls no no

[00:25:42] i'm on the verse of excarning bad not funny oh no not funny at all this necromon is mysterious

[00:25:52] and unknown is kiki mora is kiki mora i want to try and see if i know anything about these holes maybe

[00:26:03] yeah yeah go ahead okay but i have opposite day oh you have opposite day that means that if i

[00:26:11] roll hi i actually roll low by everything is inverted so instead of a minus one box you have a

[00:26:19] plus one in books i have a plus one in books that is a seven which what does this is it's still

[00:26:28] i'd make success is it still in the middle of the road the way i figured it out is the way it works

[00:26:34] inverted if you take 14 minus what you rolled that'll become the equivalent so you literally roll

[00:26:40] that's just seven you literally still roll seven so that is a mixed success all right so what you can

[00:26:46] tell from these little bite marks there's also like a tear near where the bite marks are almost

[00:26:53] like a little tusk had hit it oh okay intriguing hermano do you know anything about this little

[00:27:01] you know an a necromon that might have these big teeth tusk things big teeth tus is you

[00:27:10] is me is me what with the teeth oh no you mean the little lion what's right was i bite in the

[00:27:18] no not you oh oh that guy with the teeth luckily there is one thing i know which is even criminals

[00:27:27] know to adhere to the laws of clown town and as we all know one of the rules is that any pets

[00:27:33] that are purchased are considered co-performers and all co-performers must be registered in the big

[00:27:39] comfy house and i want to use my move works the system okay where at any point i can specify a

[00:27:46] rule or law of the area you can then add a modifier and we all vote on it so my rule that i

[00:27:53] want to say is that we basically have a city directory oh my god and one of the pieces of

[00:27:58] information is you have to write down like if you get a necromon or a pet you have to put it in

[00:28:06] the registry it's our homeowners association yeah okay in the big comfy house which is where

[00:28:12] the chair is it's like the you know city hall yeah so that's the rule i want to add how you can make

[00:28:18] a modifier to it okay and then it says everyone at the table will vote on the rule if more than half

[00:28:23] the group agrees so i think that includes you but personally i think it's fun if it's just the

[00:28:28] player oh it should just be the players do i yeah yeah uh i'm trying to think of a modifier well how

[00:28:34] he's thinking rather that we'll ask were you born with the teeth no i'm i'm this is my dead form

[00:28:41] i died with the teeth so you are born from your old life to new life with teeth i suppose if you

[00:28:49] want to look at it that way yes i mean i think that is a perfectly reasonable thing to have i mean

[00:28:59] after all he needs to eat somehow right i mean i guess i guess thank you brother maybe some

[00:29:05] things he'd buy osmosis or or whatever you know or but but in this case he has teeth

[00:29:13] if i didn't bite with teeth everybody would be wondering how do i eat how do i sustain myself

[00:29:20] that would be the question on absolutely everyone's mind do i was wondered bro how do you die just

[00:29:26] yeah well you see the fluid that one has in their digestible tract like in in the stomach right

[00:29:36] it's essentially all swishing around in the back normally it's kept behind a casing to keep

[00:29:42] the rest of my eyeball safe but it comes out when i'm digesting food now when the food is fully

[00:29:47] digested that's you know that's not a matter for children around yeah it makes makes perfect sense yes

[00:29:54] anyways to my understanding that is how this law works unless there are any modifiers that i have

[00:30:00] happened to forget about i don't have any modifiers but how would you feel if i ruined this rule and

[00:30:06] just held a soft move instead okay so yeah we basically all now get to vote on whether we want the

[00:30:12] rule to be real yeah which is just that there's a database that everyone has to put their necromanan

[00:30:19] tragic loves history so he's all for it he wants everything written down but he cannot read

[00:30:25] we have all voted in favor of this rule existing yes yes yes yeah it is the kind of information that

[00:30:30] they can find at the library which is as we all know part of the big comfy house so i suppose we

[00:30:36] should be heading there next in order to access the directory finally someone says something reasonable

[00:30:42] he's got no egg reasonable i don't even like eggs it's not an egg for you

[00:30:49] i like egg and he stomps off to the library

[00:30:53] april fools you thought you were getting a single regular episode but instead you're getting part

[00:31:19] one of two of a april fools special holiday episode now don't you feel foolish but that's not

[00:31:27] all the trickery i've got up my sleeve today for i have recently tricked our patreon subscribers

[00:31:35] into opening the patreon discord to all fans making it so that all you need to do is click the link

[00:31:43] below and for the low low price of nothing at all you too can join the quest friends official fan

[00:31:51] discord but i couldn't stop it two tricks no no i had to pull a third one and that was getting

[00:31:57] myself on a happy moment a happy moment is a weekly interview podcast that covers a variety of topics

[00:32:04] such as horror and fantasy books and movies wrestling and gaming if it's nerdy or spooky

[00:32:11] it's fair game and i would hazard a guess to say that i am a little bit of both so i trick the

[00:32:17] very nice host into bringing me on to talk about things like under the neighborhood and cartoons

[00:32:24] and just stuff i like and i had a very good time so you can find the show by searching for a

[00:32:31] happy moment podcast on facebook putter or youtube or in my final trick of today you can just click

[00:32:39] the description below and it'll bring you straight to a happy moment anyways a happy moment was really

[00:32:45] fun uh check it out it was a fun little interview that is all i've got for you this week so we will be

[00:32:52] doing part two of this april fools clown town holiday special next week monday and then the monday

[00:32:58] after that we will be back to regular episodes but with a twist what twist you ask well you'll have

[00:33:06] to listen to find out but if you like additional content short stories or behind the scenes

[00:33:12] insights you can find them at patreon.com slash quest friends i'll see you there

[00:33:37] yeah heli what does the big comfy house look like out of curiosity the big comfy how old's big and

[00:33:48] it's comfy the big comfy house it's like bear in the big blue house but the blue house is very

[00:33:55] clearly all balloons but like soft balloons do they pop no okay their magic balloons their magic

[00:34:02] soft balloons keep up with me okay and that's why that that's why it doesn't fly away like the house

[00:34:06] on up yeah it doesn't fly away they're not like yeah if it's made out of balloons does it have balloons

[00:34:11] rising out of the chimney like an up but the balloons that are rising out are like tiny little houses

[00:34:16] yes that is exactly what that means okay perfect and there's a big comfy couch in the yard when i was a

[00:34:23] child this was the little comfy hut the baba yoga lived there it's chicken legs

[00:34:31] uh sad where the eggs came from no the eggs came from my descendants for me for progeny egg

[00:34:40] i was unaware that baba yoga was such a plan of clonery i thought at the time she was

[00:34:46] somewhere else almost like the word two of in either case we're at least two i dated both

[00:34:52] all right the library is not very busy today because there's a fair going on next door

[00:34:58] everybody's over there nobody's in the library except for like the librarians who are working so

[00:35:02] you've got the run of the place okay cool i want to access the database you can access the database

[00:35:07] so since nobody knows the name of this necroman what exactly are you looking up how many people live

[00:35:12] in clown town hang on seven average population mountain town mountain town 19 000 19

[00:35:23] ooh well around that up to 20 all right um so we can't brute force it the amount of people who own

[00:35:30] necroman is probably lower than that so if you wanted to filter you'd only have to sort through

[00:35:34] probably 10 to 15 000 oh well just 10 to 15 000 that's fine yeah that's reasonable

[00:35:40] well this would likely be an exotic necroman right maybe it could be if it's a rare in necroman

[00:35:47] that we can identify that would mean 3.196 percent of the people in this town likely own an exotic

[00:35:55] necroman which with the population of 20 000 means we would need to search through 639.2 entry

[00:36:05] that's considerably less than those other numbers that i said earlier so let's say it takes

[00:36:10] half a minute to read through each entry yeah that many minutes give me give me 5.326 to the

[00:36:19] repeating hours and I will be able to find our culprit won't the festival me over yes but law is

[00:36:27] not about solving an issue while it happens it is about figuring out who is at fault after the fact

[00:36:32] when i was alive there were less laws and it was good i assure you as i've mentioned many times

[00:36:40] clonery and the laws of clown town are in fact no laughing matter and they must be treated with

[00:36:46] the utmost seriousness new laws like do not burn witches that piers oh we're gonna take a cloud

[00:36:54] for kinky kinky yeah i'm gonna follow my back and start rocking back in 40 like a turtle

[00:37:02] i wasn't expecting that to actually topple the upper right away oh i'll help you up hello excuse me

[00:37:10] sir i am Polish librarian this is Polish this is Polish hello sir can i assist this is Polish

[00:37:21] this is Polish oh little kodzani we need information yes specifically where we are looking for

[00:37:29] what my mouth opens up and it's spits out that i shoot on oh i would like to hold up my two-pointer fingers

[00:37:40] in a little cross oh we're looking for a necroman that could have by chance made this marking here

[00:37:48] yes okay okay let me consult the encyclopedia of necroman markings and i can i can help okay

[00:37:56] thank you very much for your professionalism and discretion in this matter yes yes of course i am

[00:38:01] neblerty and that is the very essence of library what is this person's pronounce uh sheer when you

[00:38:08] teach women to read no they are much more helpful than men oh yes yes that is what my barbages

[00:38:18] see you know how to respect your elders you are my vnuchia now this is also what my barbages says

[00:38:27] i am not your barbja i know but i bet you two would hit it off okay i meet your barbja later do you

[00:38:38] meet my barbja later she come to library so what what for what and she's looking through the big

[00:38:44] like bam encyclopedia of necroman marks for what for why do you look for these marks that is confidential

[00:38:52] legal information oh okay see okay i apologize deeply uh so why do you look for marks and she's

[00:38:59] asking specifically the other two now you two are not legally you're not obligated to answer her

[00:39:05] questions in any way a shape or form but i really i really prohibited to answer those questions

[00:39:11] i don't care either way this is my vulgar now wait vukshah wait just just vnuchia vnuchia vnuchia

[00:39:22] yeah that is me you can't tell that i'm an eyeball anymore because i fully close my eyes and i'm

[00:39:28] pinching the equivalent of the bridge of my nose is your hand really big yeah i forgot to mention

[00:39:35] that i got giant sora clown shoes and giant mickey mouse gloves with three fingers god i love it

[00:39:43] i thought you were gonna say giant sora clown shoes for hey no that sounds very inconvenient

[00:39:52] i must make lawyer ring very difficult no um a little creature a little creature eat our

[00:40:01] cards oh it's cards well there's no evidence that it actually eat the cards well you know we

[00:40:08] we as suspected criminal this necromanal is chewed on but may not have eaten cards but my nuke

[00:40:21] over here he eats anything so could be interesting interesting okay okay judging by this entry

[00:40:30] in this big encyclopedia i am reading through and also these things that you have said makes me

[00:40:35] think of pakky fant pakky packey mouse pakky fant pakky fant pakky fant my clever little coach

[00:40:46] honey this pakky fant yes yes there is pakky fant at um i find i find i find and she's gonna

[00:40:54] fish out a little business card that she's gonna hand you oh my dear nocia there is pakky fant at

[00:41:01] this location very cute very cute little pakky fant and the business card is purple the font is so

[00:41:10] silvery shiny that whoever's holding it you got to kind of like turn it a little bit before the

[00:41:13] light hits it in such a way that it's actually readable and the business card says randy scandal

[00:41:20] scary big circus okay okay kocchani when your pub chadais yes you give her egg yes i get her egg

[00:41:28] for when she dies when she dies yes comes for the spring uh-huh you give her egg okay and honey

[00:41:36] but for why and vodka she has not asked for these things and vodka i if she asks for the vodka

[00:41:43] no no no no she does not need to ask you need to give this tradition just the ones in the spring

[00:41:50] maybe all the time if you don't want to you could you could get vodka with my papcia

[00:41:56] if if you have if you happen to have two bottles you can also give it to the friend of the

[00:42:02] we have the spring chatty and we have the fall chatty and so we have both for politeness sake and

[00:42:11] the vermina undercover can we please stay quiet during the performance can i say and i will do an

[00:42:16] ap if we need to that this conversation is happening after we've like jumped over to the circus

[00:42:22] and were like all sitting watching it undercover we just brought this library and was the library you

[00:42:28] just came with you like she just came with you sure

[00:42:58] oh my god everyone's recording

[00:43:06] Jesus Christ, he'll turn your microphone down what you just said it was fine

[00:43:13] you're peaking be when you did ah you can see the wavelengths of everyone else and you're peaking

[00:43:21] to infinity and fucking beyond if it helps it didn't like it's my my faaaaaa earphones didn't explode

[00:43:29] so i think it's a Kyle problem yeah Kyle it could be a me problem yeah yeah okay so i looked

[00:43:38] up with a couple words in my grandma's dictionary and she told me how to say them but i can't say

[00:43:45] them very well but i'm gonna do it anyway which i feel okay about because Kyle speaks Spanish in

[00:43:51] this podcast this is the second time you've pointed that out you like spoke something and you had to

[00:43:57] do a re-dubbing Spanish for the episode i'm releasing which is the one that came out last week i'm

[00:44:02] making myself feel better you went out of your way to say well Kyle speaks it and i was being

[00:44:07] nothing but supportive of you i'm making myself feel better by putting others down it's opposite day

[00:44:14] it's opposite day usually i mean to myself Emily has this right as progetec also can we appreciate how

[00:44:23] hally didn't have any female NPCs so then she made the only one a librarian oh no and then i had

[00:44:32] to google the word for grandmother despite tom having said it eight million times babtjes that

[00:44:37] is what my babtjes is and i have some musical ambiance for you musical ambiance

[00:44:45] have lump oh that i have linked in the chat oh my god i forgot i forgot about this i did not

[00:44:52] i was like i swear to god if this is the phoenix right circus music yeah i forgot about this circus

[00:44:58] i'll never forget that fucking i don't know why i hate it so much everybody hates churn about

[00:45:05] big top i almost called this turn around big top but it's the very big circus so it was scary big

[00:45:11] circus because it was funnier if we don't finish by two hours i say we pull out a cliffhanger and

[00:45:17] say are you expecting another part april fool that would be really funny i think i can do it

[00:45:25] though actually i was actually stalling a little bit because i was like oh they might get through

[00:45:28] this faster than i thought why we've done nothing why because it's funny it's fun no no

[00:45:35] i'm i'm saying why did you think we were gonna get through it faster than you expected

[00:45:41] because we've done nothing i know which don't get me wrong is fun i just don't know why you think

[00:45:47] we're speeding through it no i wanted to avoid i don't think you're speeding through it but that's

[00:45:52] because i decided to let um i don't know anymore just don't just never i'm afraid i know i'm

[00:45:59] sorry i wasn't making fun of you i was making fun of us i don't believe you